As a writer, I argue with my own thoughts constantly. There are times when I don’t know which ideas are good and which are bad.
I portray a totally different thought process…… depending on my moods. On bad days, I want to give up and burn every piece of writing that I have. On good days, I want to sing so loud that everyone can hear me. Then there are the mediocre days. These are the days, when I feel lost but still have enough strength to find my way out.
This past Saturday, I experienced a bad and a mediocre day. All within a time span of a few hours.
Just me…..myself……and a million, uninvited ideas. All of us were cruising south down IH 35, after Saturday’s class. No matter if my car were the size of a Greyhound Bus, it would have been too close for comfort. Trying my best to ignore my passengers, I resisted the urge to open the driver door and bail.
Let me introduce you to the passengers on board the Car Ride from Hell
Me,is someone I have known all my life. She is usually the driver, in most situations. On occasion, she will allow someone else to take the wheel. But it is rare. Always focused at the task at hand, she knows exactly how long it would take from Point A to Point B. She is a no nonsense kind of girl. Well, most of the time……
Myself, is a little trigger happy. She prefers to ride shotgun most trips. Mouthing off whenever the mood strikes her. She rarely filters what she thinks before it flies from her mouth. She is not allowed out much. She was overwhelmed at this particular time. She wanted to stop for a milkshake. She needed to stop and pee. She was annoying Me.
Finally, meet the Million Ideas, who occupied the back seat and any other crevice they could squeeze in to. Some of them lacked brains and had no common sense. These were the ones rolling around and flying into the front seat, at each tap of the brake. The good ones, stayed tucked away. Scared for their life.
Me and Myself became quite irritated about 5 miles in. Causing Myself, the uninhibited one, to spit curse words every 5 seconds. She was also busy blaming Me for signing us up for this class. Because of Me, we had to deal with the unruly ideas flying around.
You see, knowledge does this. We take it all in, but Myself forgets to siphon the nonsense out. Allowing our brain to become so full. Thoughts become murky. The information turns sticky, thick and useless.
I needed to calm us down.
So, I allowed Myself to talk Me into that chocolate milkshake. Bribery works with kids, right? Well, this situation was not much different.
After stopping and calmly ordering, we waited. Allowing Myself and the Million Ideas time to fight it out. We took the “may the best one win” approach.
By the time our dessert was delivered, a truce was called. We also lightened the load. Kicking out a few of the stupid, useless ideas while buckling in the ones with possibilities.
“Myself” passed out from a sugar coma within a mile…..
Well, she turned up the radio and enjoyed the inner silence that had been achieved.